sunday

at this time of the day when there is a soft glow of yellow gold floating in the house i am feeling lethargic and reluctant to let go and let this time pass when everything seems so still and silent and you just want to stand there and admire it but you know you cant because in a few minutes it will be dark and tomorrow you will be returning to the hectic life that never seems to slow down and stop so much that you wonder why do i live to exist in such a stressful environment where i cant enjoy the simple things because at the back of my mind there is always something to attend to and so spend youth chasing unclear goals that for moments cloud our vision and finally when time is about to rob us of our life that the veil is lifted and we realise what a waste it was.

...

everytime im alone with nothing to do i begin to think of all the stuff ive done that day and sometimes i will remember something that i did which did not seem so bad but now is very embarassing to me and i wonder why i feel so bad and sometimes i remember an incident when i think that i went out of control and i wonder how my friends can stand me because i certainly cant and all these funny thoughts enter my head with embarassing moments from long ago making their appearance and i feel so bad that i dont want to do anything but cover my head with a pillow and pray that my mind will just shut up and go to sleep.